Cloud inversion

Who would win the battle of the sandwiches? Whose butty would be better? We took the train to Blackrod, and clambered up through the woods to see the waterfalls. The mist was cool in the air, moistening my beard as we climbed over the moorland towards the tower at Rivington Pike. We watched the tops of the clouds and ate our lunch, as dogs ran, scrapped, and yapped around us. We strolled down through the ornamental gardens, past this amazing sideways tree on the shores of a lake. I held Laura’s eyes closed as I guided her into Lever Castle. She opened them, and squealed with surprise! I smiled, and we started to explore the ruins.

The unread drawer

The course convenor for the Bolton course hasn’t been particularly helpful. He suggested, rather strongly, that I ought to think about taking the MBA course instead of the course I want to do. I held fast. He explained that the first year of the MBA is the same as the course I wanted to do, only more advanced. I’m looking for an introductory course, no dice. He explained that the modules were the same modules, only that there were three of them, rather than six. That’s not what I’m after either, I explained.

“We’re not actually running that course this year.”

Right.

On the flipside, the convenor of the Stockport course couldn’t have been more helpful. We talked about the modules, the course schedule, the residential weekend – we talked about assessment, and about group assignments. It’s not cheap, but it’s worth it. Where do I sign?

Afterwards, I met Jacqui and Sam for Wagamama and a few beers. I bloody love Sam and Jacqui. We ate noodles and exchanged cycling tips. Nothing changes in the old office, nor in the new one. The procurement dodging that my boss has been championing raised a few eyebrows. Their reports drawer would bulge if they were reviewing my service, I said. It wouldn’t matter, they said, nobody reads them anyway.

Phew!

I passed my exam. And I got a merit too.

What next? Maybe a course in management? Maybe this one? I do like Bolton too.

I still don't like Alton Towers, five years on

I met Lucinda for part two of Operation Toothfix. She’d offered me a lift into Bolton last time, gem that she is, so we got the chance to have a bit of a chat on the way. Conversation meandered from the car seat being very reclined, through to Alton Towers and the story of my disastrous visit there with Rigby all that time ago, and naturally on into the realm of relationships with exes. I was very conscious of not wanting to put Lucinda into an awkward position vis-à-vis Liz and I. Luckily we kept our discussion quite general. We talked about how people drift into and out of our lives. Sometimes you can control how that goes and sometimes you can’t.

“Are you seeing anybody at the minute David?”
“No.”

We had a moment of silence, and then we started to talk about holidays.

My treatment was really fucking painful. A deep clean isn’t pleasant for the patient, and I doubt it’s much fun for the dentist or the nurse. But my teeth felt amazing afterwards. The root canal stuff went pretty well too, Lu said that the lack of discomfort and swelling was a pretty good sign.

No Thornton’s this time round, but I’ve got big plans for next time…

Lucinda is a legend

The temporary cap on my chipped teeth fell off last night, after eight years. I wasn’t sure what to do, so I texted Lucinda to ask for some advice.

- Would you like me to have a look at them?
- That’d be great, can I come round now?"
- I meant look at them at work. Tomorrow maybe?"
- Wow! Yes please that’d be amazing, thank you!"

I popped to Thorntons to pick up a little something to show my appreciation, and then headed out via the magnificent Victoria Station towards Bolton.

On the train to Bolton, an old lady comes over to explain a landmark we'd passed. She wears bright pink lipstick, like neon.

I think I must have copied down the postcode wrongly, as I found myself exploring 5LU rather than 4LU. Lost! In Bolton! Fuck! I was being squeezed in as a favour, and I was going to be late. I felt like I was in a mediocre sitcom. Opposite a co-op, by a pharmacy Lucinda had said.

Picture message: Do you work here?



Answer: No. Then I found out where it was, and I ran. And ran. And ran. In my shirt, in my tie, in my shoes and work trousers, I ran. I wonder if Lucinda has ever had a sweatier patient.

And, fountain of kindness that Lucinda is, my treatment was far more than the look she'd offered. An x-ray, a burr-ing, a sort of cap on one tooth, root canal work on the other, a temporary dressing, and a Spiderman sticker. And, above all, a complete absence of my normal knotting stomach of fear. I felt so relaxed. What a brilliant dentist. I'm so very grateful. Thanks a million Lucinda.