In the Mood For Love

In a moment eerily reminiscent of the Wong Kar-Wai film, I spent five minutes last night talking to a young lady who I developed a crush on when she worked behind the bar at my local. We were talking about the way that, in her new bar job, she has gotten quite good at giving overly amorous customers scathing put-downs. She asked me to 'test her' - to give her a chat-up line for her to demonstrate her proficiency at batting them away. Does she know that I like her? I think I've made it pretty obvious. So was she playing with me? Was it a twisted sort of flirting?

I want a hole in the wall that I can fill up with secrets.

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UPDATE 06-04-08:

1. I found my hole in the wall, up by the Peveril of the Peak.



2. It's stupid and unfair for me to be angry about the incident above. I've known for three months that the person I've got a crush on isn't available - in fact, she's got a boyfriend, and she's really happy with him. I'm far too cowardly to seek out a new target for my affection - it's so much easier to put energy into something that's never going to come off than to invest in something that might fail, because at least I know the outcome of running down the dead end. I wasn't being toyed with, I was being given an gentle reminder by my crush that she isn't really that into me and I should be grateful for the delicacy of the message, rather than angry at its content. Why have an unreachable dream? Because at least I know how it'll turn out.